Author: Kayla Richardson

“People”

A poem about, well, people

Once a person helped me, and I tried to help them too

Once a person hurt me, and I knew not what to do

Once a person loved me, and I tried to love them too 

Once a person left me, and cry all I could do 

People have a heartbeat

People can breathe deep 

People inhale softly 

People don’t think when they speak 

Person sitting in the corner

Person in the crowd

Person leaning on my shoulder

Person in the shroud

Laughing woman at the party

Crying children in the dark 

Smiling man on a rollercoaster 

Hurting human in her sleep

Every person made by Jesus 

All made to be loved 

Even those who tore our souls

And those who slit our throats  

Happy people

Yelling people 

Bleeding people 

Caring people 

Let us learn to love the people 

And maybe love us too 

For God so died to save the people 

Counting me and you 

Living / Dying

Inspired by the words of Jesus in Mark 8:31-38

Therein the act of living,

A choice we face each day —

Will we choose to die to self 

Or self do we obey? 

The answer seems foreboding 

I know what I must choose.

Our Master points the way so clear

We’ve everything to lose. 

Inside our hearts beat vying 

To own our weary souls

Guiding to the darkest lusts

And making spirits dull.

Self worship’s lips stand lying

With words of sin and pride.  

Infected claims of tainted hope 

Now slaughter us inside. 

There’s wholeness in our dying 

When self is thrown away — 

When everything we thought we lost

Is gained another way.

The paradox of suff’ring —

Where trials have their place

To shape our aching heartbeats

And to point us to His grace. 

Let dying be our living; 

Let Him open up our eyes 

To a world with hope unending

Where His kingdom is our prize. 

Silence (Nothing)

Responding to the suffering in the ER, and life in general – Emergency: Part Four

Face to face with suffering

Time to confront grief

Nothing here but silence

Nothing left to see 

And if I try to listen 

To the preaching from my seat

Processing is nothing 

And silence comforts me

Can one tear suffice thinking

Could words learn to forgive

If I chose to be silent 

When there’s nothing left to give?

Ask me now what words I feel  

But nothing dwells inside 

Silence is the best of me

The refuge where I hide 

Christ exists in silence

If I listen to Him speak

Nothing here will fill me

When Him I learn to seek 

Will one tear suffice thinking

Will words learn to forgive

If I choose to be silent 

When there’s nothing left to give?

Nothing left for me to do 

But sit here at His feet

Nothing words could ever tell 

When silence comforts me 

Learning slow how silence proves 

The end of self is Him 

I will not fear if all I give

Is nothing from within 

One tear will suffice thinking

Words will learn to forgive

As I choose to be silent 

When there’s nothing left to give

“Concentrate”

Emergency: Part Three

They told me

I needed to be organized

     So I tried to be organized – except!

Nothing changed. 

            I was helped 

And I think I learned how 

     To adapt 

         So I made myself a motto 

   “It’s ok, I’ll figure it out” 

      So, I went to the med room 

To let just three tears slip 

           As I tried to focus – but 

My patient yelled

               And one paced  

     In the hallway, screaming out

            Profanities 

        And my preceptor asked me 

   “Will you be able to be organized?” 

         Thankfully,

My lungs worked rhythmically 

     Enough to take a breath – and then! 

My heart broke 

             As I realized 

   My sweet patient’s daughter 

         Had died 

            So, I tried to refocus and pray

       “Lord, at least help me to love” 

              It’s hard to love 

 While trying to be organized 

       For one moment I was fine – until! 

  A patient couldn’t cope 

              One couldn’t walk 

    And while I went to get a blood draw 

           One seized 

        And still, in the meantime, another asked 

    “Why can’t you help me?”

            Then, because I 

 Admitted to my preceptor 

           I needed help focusing – suddenly! 

I was being watched 

               And being timed

Carefully, I counted the minutes 

      Ten minutes 

   To place an IV and assess, so I said  

 “This will be possible” 

            Then somehow 

It was end of the shift 

        And in a span of – 12 hours!

God had taught me 

       Humility 

Being reminded of His strength 

      Is beautiful  

   And in my weakness 

“[His] grace is sufficient” 

            I truly love 

The emergency room 

           Because in its halls – full of despair!

     God always shows up 

         And crucified 

Become my abilities 

     As I learn to concentrate 

    On the reality of what He told me 

  “Just trust Me in the tension” 

“Hallways”

And Emergency: Part Two

We walk quickly

Down the hallways 

In the absence of

Silence.

Is it possible, still 

To hear you?

We walk into

curtained rooms

In the presence of…

Trying. 

So hard, it seems,

To see you

We kneel on the

Blood-stained floors 

As you call out – 

Crying.

Your pain, we try

To feel you

We sit at our

Small, wheeled desks 

And still we smell the

Dying – 

Of dreams, so quick 

To flee you

Yet as I walk

These hallways 

In the absence of 

Silence – 

Your heartbeat, still

I hear you

And Christ will walk

Besides me

And we will taste His

Presence 

My patient, friend 

He’s with you 

Photo credit: https://www.statnews.com/2020/01/24/patients-restrained-in-the-er/